There has been some serious philosophising going on in the Konami offices, about whether it is morally acceptable to graphically slice up human beings into bite-sized chunks with katana swords in slow motion. Their answer to this question was impressive: you can if you turn them all into half-human cyborgs. Blood, guts and electrical wiring makes all the difference. It’s a pity then that they didn’t spend a bit more time putting some meat on this new addition to the Metal Gear canon’s bones.
Without going too much into the plot (incidentally neither does the game), this story is all about Raiden, the high-heeled half-human cyborg of MGS2 and 4. In a world where private military companies are keeping the peace, Raiden and his employers Maverick Security find themselves in a pitched battle against the evil Desperado Enterprises. So far so blah. The thrills in this game are definitely not in the story; they’re in the fighting, which is where the kinky fun really begins.
Taking a massive leap away from the tactical espionage action of the previous games (sneaky sneaky, shooty shooty) we are plunged into "lightning bolt action". Instead of stealthily (and lengthily) out-manoeuvring your enemies, you now have Ninja Dash and can plummet towards and around them at great speed, leaping over and through obstacles at terminal velocity to outflank foes.
Blade Mode slows time and gives you a 3D arena in which to meticulously dissect enemies. With a couple of clicks you can initiate Zandatsu (pictured right), a neat trick that allows you to steal their energy (and spinal cords), and to pinpoint their exact weak spots for a glamorous takedown. Eventually you even get Jack the Ripper Mode where you can slice and dice even the most solid of metal gears, all to the epic sounds of blaring emo-rock.
Be warned, however, that the game only makes token efforts to explain the controls, so you’ll have to work them out for yourself. It’s also quite easy to die (worth it to hear your comrades’ hysterical reactions over the radio), but you do get an abundance of extra lives, so this doesn’t exactly slow you down. A major bonus is that you get a dog called Wolf. Or rather an AI called LQ-84i (pictured below) which, after failing to kill you, is converted into a loyal point-man and philosophical sparring partner.
Unfortunately there’s no getting away from the fact that Raiden looks like a cross between Ziggy Stardust and an albino Sonic the Hedgehog in a robot costume. Not to mention the golden buttocks which are immensely distracting. Immensely. The levels are attractive but relatively flat and empty, with exploration discouraged as your companions incessantly nag you to get to your next target. There’s also a major issue with the camera which swings wildly about during fights and can totally scupper your parry and aim. But despite these glaring (golden) issues, Revengeance is a fast and furious game that’s worth a play for the combat alone. And when the chips are down, remember, there’s blades in them there heels!
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